"jem6x has an excellent diary on Newsweek's great cover story on the Bible and gay marriage. Go check it out. But this comment by gladkov was particularly excellent. In short, if we are to let the Bible define what "traditional marriage" should look like, then our marriage laws should be amended as such:
A. Marriage in the United States shall consist of a union between one man and one or more women. (Gen 29:17-28; II Sam 3:2-5)
B. Marriage shall not impede a man's right to take concubines in addition to his wife or wives. (II Sam 5:13; I Kings 11:3; II Chron 11:21)
C. A marriage shall be considered valid only if the wife is a virgin. If the wife is not a virgin, she shall be executed. (Deut 22:13-21)
D. Marriage of a believer and a non-believer shall be forbidden. (Gen 24:3; Num 25:1-9; Ezra 9:12; Neh 10:30)
E. Since marriage is for life, neither this Constitution nor the constitution of any State, nor any state or federal law, shall be construed to permit divorce. (Deut 22:19; Mark 10:9)
F. If a married man dies without children, his brother shall marry the widow. If he refuses to marry his brother's widow or deliberately does not give her children, he shall pay a fine of one shoe and be otherwise punished in a manner to be determined by law. (Gen 38:6-10; Deut 25:5-10)
G. In lieu of marriage, if there are no acceptable men in your town, it is required that you get your dad drunk and have sex with him (even if he had previously offered you up as a sex toy to men young and old),tag-teaming with any sisters you may have. Of course, this rule applies only if you are female.(Gen 19:31-36) "
4 comments:
love it.
Was G. verbatim?
Great post! They want to point to the parts that supposedly call being gay a sin, but forget that what they are doing is just as big a sin, according to the Good Book.
BTW, it says nothing about lesbianism being a sin (as far as I know). It just talks aobut man-on-man action being sinful. I guess even back then guys thought it was hot if two women got together and disgusting if two men did. :P
I just don't get how people can believe the Bible is literal! Yeah, a man lived in the belly of a whale and Moses was hundreds of years old. Makes sense to me. :P Sheesh.
you tell em honey!!
Post a Comment